Hanging around

Now I know it's only hump day but it's felt like a long week. My capecitabine is yet to start because of a delay in my blood results. I had a few extra tests including genetics because apparently some people can have an enzyme in their blood that can have a negative reaction to this type of chemotherapy (rare but not impossible) so it's been checked as routine to be on the safe side.

I had a phone call off the pharmacist on Monday with my full instructions so I am literally good to go, just waiting on my blood results.

I also had a phone call today from one of the breast care nurses letting me know (about the delay) that I should either get the results on Friday or Monday at the very latest. It is a little frustrating but other than just being a little tired I've had a really good week so I should see it as a positive because I don't know what to expect from the side effects - it's one thing to be told and another thing altogether to experience.

So in the mean time I'm just trying to just do what I want. Steroids aren't helping (well they are... mostly with the headaches and keeping me awake) as we all know they are notorious for making you put on weight, and I've put on ALOT. But with such a poor prognosis, when my appetite does come back, I'm literally eating what I want, when I want. I do wonder every now and then what if I end up being one of those miracles that lives for a few years and I've just piled on all this weight but I guess I'd just have to cross that bridge if I get there. 😂 I could say "as long as I'm healthy" but as long as I have cancer, I never will be so let's just focus on the "as long as I'm happy."

That's not to say I'm not still having my down moments, the experience is an emotional and overwhelming one, but as I keep saying: one day at a time.