Post Revelation

So I got the official news. August 16th 2019 was when my whole world came crashing down. It's true what they say that you don't hear anything else after the dreaded C word but another word creeps in to your head as soon as you do hear it; death. Because let's face it, if you aren't directly affected by somebody who has lost their life to such a cruel disease then are you are INCREDIBLY lucky. It is shoved in our faces daily without even realising it.

Although thoughts of dying do creep in, there is alot of information given to you and things you don't consider when being given such devastating news. Of course you're given your options and at the time of my diagnosis I wasn't aware that my prognosis would become "life limiting" until the following January.

Which brings me to the subject of Secondary Cancer - also known as metastatic, stage 4 or the other dreaded word incurable. It basically means that the original cancer has migrated to another area of the body through the blood stream to set up camp and continue to grow there.

After a secondary diagnosis a whole new world is opened up and you hear stories of people living with cancer as more of a chronic illness being kept under control by different medications and treatments. I was astounded by the amount of people continuing to thrive DECADES after their initial diagnosis, with their treatment regimes stopping any further growth altogether. This is known as NEAD or no evidence of active disease.

In my case, my cancer has proven too aggressive and nothing is yet to stop or slow the growth when there's nothing going into my system. Treatment has shrunk areas but as soon as I stop, it starts to grow again.

Silver linings in present day... I'm on treatment now! Yay! This means I've been deemed well enough to try and hope it works. I have no end date for this course so here's to staying positive and this could be the one that works for me for a while to come.

Yes, this disease will get me eventually and I now feel I have accepted that.

But until that time comes... one day at a time.